Peeves

Today, Brian is out of town so I am treating myself to several things I've been wanting to do: Go to the library (I haven't been in nearly 2 months and I am seriously running out of things to read), eat at a cheap Thai place I like (soup and an entree for $6!), and watch one (maybe 2) of my favorite girly movies.

But first, I just have to rant about 2 things.

1.) People assuming I am 15. I am not. I have crow's feet around my eyes, people. These are not the crow's feet of a 15 year old.

Also, it is not appropriate to approach me, someone you've never met, and ask me, a.) if i'm a student (why does this matter? People can be students at any age), b.) when I stress that I am a GRADUATE student, feel the need to comment on how young I look (example from this past weekend..."you look like a young'un!") b/c NO, you're not the first person to ever tell me that, and no, I don't appreciate it. People don't walk up to you and say you look old. But you do. and c.) expect me to smile and thank you. I'm not going to thank you. I may appreciate it when I'm 40, but not if it means you can't respect me professionally and as a person. Also, you're weird for feeling the burning need to ask if I am fifteen. What's it to you?

Also, lately I've had people asking if my nose is real. WHAT? Of course it is. But apparently it's what people are asking for when they get a nose job now. That is just strange. Yes , my nose is real (my dad and grandma have the exact same nose, so I can prove it), but if it wasn't, don't you think that would make me feel pretty self-conscious about my fake nose?

2.) Comprehensive sex-ed in schools.

Everybody at school takes it for granted that we all want this. But I don't. Not only do I think it's creepy/inappropriate to discuss sex with children, I think it's the wrong answer to teen pregnancy. Should there be less teen pregnancy? Well, probably...but abortion/using contraception is not the answer.

Instead of asking how we can help children have sex, we should be asking WHY ON EARTH 13-year-olds want to have sex in the first place. I'm not completely naive (I did go to a pretty poor public middle school, after all...I started having pregnant girls in my class in 6th grade), I know they have sex. But is it because they really want to, or because our society has created an environment where everything is sexualized, including children? Are they having sex because they feel like they have to to be normal?

I vividly remember a boyfriend I had when I was about 15 telling me we needed to have sex b/c normal couples did. Thank goodness I had enough common sense to tell him this was crazy, but I know not every girl does. Shouldn't we be telling kids that it's ok NOT to have sex, instead of stressing that they should, and use protection while doing it? Shouldn't we be telling them it's ok to still act like kids BECAUSE THEY ARE, instead of turning them into adults at 12 when they're emotionally unready for the consequences?

I am 24 years old, and I've never had sex. I'm positive I'm not the only person on this planet capable of that decision. Is it hard? Yes. Sometimes I do wish I could be like the gang on Sex and the City...but then I think about how emotionally screwed up Carrie Bradshaw is. I mean, really...she has to use clothes and shoes to feel good about herself. Is this the message we're sending our teenagers?

Comprehensive sex ed is not the answer. Letting kids know it's ok not to have to be sexual is. Some kids may still choose to...but there are others who are sitting in that class, feeling awkward b/c their boyfriend is pressuring them and they're being told it's ok for him to do that as long as he brings a condom. And they need to be supported in saying no. It is ok to say no at 13. It is ok to say no at 24. Sex is not the answer, and I don't want my kids, if I have any, to be told that it is. And I don't want to pay for a public school system that does it to other people's kids, my niece for example. As someone I know says, "That's not right". And it isn't.